i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
No need to get angry I'm just tryin to get my door back
If you were a good friend you would take the nipple tassels off me before the ambulance comes.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
do you want to shower with me?
only if we can drink the jungle juice while we shower
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
Randomize
