I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
what happens if a cat eats a birth control pill? i mean i don't care about the cat i really just don't want to get pregnant
sometimes i wish i could just stick a turkey baster up there and suck out the blood
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
Are you still crying. What are you doing. Have 10 shots of tequila.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
One day no one will want to send me dick pics so by all means keep 'em coming
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
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