I just showed my boobs to our astate representative hahahahahahha
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Omg how many tall cans is too many tall cans for 1 pm
Did you have ill-advised lesbian sex on the deathbed of their relationship?
Of course. Go big or go home.
You're my fucking queen.
you did that thing you do when youre drunk where you rant about bruce springsteen, start hooking up with someone and then pass out midway through
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Randomize
