take the plastic off of my new air freshener and i'm not going to eat you out for a month.
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
Just got a full body massage. It was uncomfortable at first, but then I realized I let strangers turn off the lights and put their hands all over my naked body 3 times a week anyways.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
We thought she was passed out on the toilet, but she raised her head to tell me the word I couldn't remember was "empathize." Then she puked blood and passed out.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
I am become drunk, destroyer of all worlds
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
Gotta say, self-deprecating Lord of the Rings-themed sex jokes were not on my agenda for today.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
