I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
It is virtually impossible to listen to single ladies and perform any seated task.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Well some days you just have to get blackout drunk and try to speak Spanish to French Canadian strangers
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
He called me for phone sex. Do you know how hard it is to fake an orgasm, and play Candy Crush at the same time?
I barfed on the cat last night. Just wanted to share.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
We're going to watch the inauguration and fuck. Or fuck and watch the inauguration, I'm not picky, just get your ass over here by ten.
Randomize
