your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
She left me a voicemail too. It's just her moaning her name repeatedly
He's a navy seal. He can stick it anywhere he wants.
when i saw his roomate the next night he kept openly referring to me as "the girl who orgasms loud" when he would try to get my attention
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
If fixing it is ignoring it, and getting naked. Then yes we fixed it.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
i do my most serious thinking while screwing her. ive pondered everything from quantum physics to the life cycle of a badger. if i keep this up ill have a phd in no time.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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