hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Randomize
