so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
i awoke yet another morning with penis breath. ive been so generous santa has to bring me a shit ton of presents
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
nothing like morning wood sex at 4pm. funemployment ftw
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
On a scale of 1 to 3, with 1 being the smallest and 3 being the largest, what size nipple pasty do you think I am?
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
I'm just gonna clean the house so my Mom won't think I'm hung over. I'll just start with the toilet
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
I just got the most majestic image of a potato sack full of dildos getting whipped at your head in slow motion.
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
My roommate's overnight guest is screaming about the dog licking his asshole. I need a new place to live.
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