Just got done reading an 11 page essay for class. Took me three fucking days and the only thing I have highlighted is the name "Alexander Cockburn"
The only good thing about trampolines when you're fucked up is the gushing blood really cleans all the bad coke out of your nose.
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
Well, let's be honest here. You're dealing with gay guys... EVERYTHING has an emotional attachment.
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
Well my summer started by me waking up in a tube on the side of the pond this morning with 2 of my friends. So that's good..
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
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