Last night we were drunk and talking about rude things, I mentioned felching and had to explain it to everyone. Everyone was disgusted and asked how I knew about such filth and I told them you told me. Don't get mad. Also a quck heads up, you might get gifts of straws at work,
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
my bedside table was not meant to hold this many beer bottles.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
There are at least 3.6 billion human cocks in this world. Get some. Get as many as humanly possible. Literally. Do it. 1-2-3 go!
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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