garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
We're attempting to get a tally of how may people puked last night...Please respond with your vomit status.
Can we end it on a good note at least? Can we fuck and then never talk again?
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I swear god is testing me by giving me awesome guys with tiny penises
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
I licked your asshole in confidence.
Woke up from a black out in a strangers Jeep without phone, shoes, or wallet.
Fun fact: deep throating plus dehydration plus eating a lot of citrus = my throat is fucked. Metaphorically and physically.
Randomize
