Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
we fucked while he was on the clock. He didnt even take off his bullet proof vest. Dont tell me thats not bad ass.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
So here I am, sexting at work.
I want to ride that like one of the Horsemen of the Apocalypse- with bourbon in hand and without mercy.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
