I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
walking through the french quarter. a homeless guy just offered me a pigeon. gotta love new orleans.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
We just ended up getting drunk and doing field sobriety tests on each for practice... No one remembers who passed.
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
So we just accidentally broke into a building from the third floor while carrying shovels. The security guards are still very confused
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I went shopping for a dress that was baptism and bar appropriate.
#tbt to when you let me put plastic wrap on your balls and hum a little song
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
If dispatch calls for us tell them I'm having a significant emotional event in the restroom
Randomize
