i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
hot buttered vodka was not a success. on any level.
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
