why did i save someone in my phone as corn dildo?
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
There were gay boys and a jukebox. It was like god wanted me to.
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
MY GOD WHY DIDN'T I TAKE PHOTOS OF HIS CREDIT CARDS WHILE HE WAS SLEEPING
So apparently I’m into choking now
But then our conversations are like black box recordings. Just the stuff you hear when the plane is going down
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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