Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
I only think it appropriate to apologize for making out with your next boyfriend. It won't happen again.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize
