She told me a very interesting story, complete with pantomimes, about how she got a habanero seed in her vag
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
My vagina bone hurts from grinding on that dude so hard.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Next year, please remind me not to be at a damn Super Bowl party with screaming children whose parents can't control them. I will sell the little suckers to the fucking circus passing through town.
He asked me who my new boyfriend was and I showed him a picture of my sex toys.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Chili is not acceptable fuck buddy food.
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