This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
I'm sitting in class drinking a forty out of a paper bag. No ones said anything yet. I think my professor is trying to ignore me. Better start yelling louder.
Disregard the shoes in the freezer.
I was blowing him while he was singing Happy Birthday to his girlfriend on the phone. I win.
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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