he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
The only word I understood in that whole setence was semen.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
What's life without a pregnancy scare?
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
My Mini-Van Handjob Milf is leaving the company. I need to find a new job. I can’t handle this place without those handjobs
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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