so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
He slapped my ass and hummed the jello theme song, which was followed by an overly loud "IT'S ALIVE!"
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
do you remember when we thought we were both knocked up by the same guy like two days apart and would have half twins? Thats a best friend moment.
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
Marking my student's "don't do drugs" posters while simultaneously texting my dealer, is this what being a grown up is like?
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Why did I wake up covered in glitter next to a half eaten cheeseburger?
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