i found out what alaskan girls practice during those six months of darkness
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
If he's dead I'm so gonna get the blame. I have his passport, keys and his tooth in my purse.
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
she is like a cock bee. instead of going from flower to flower she goes from cock to cock
No, it's ok. He's Greek. To him I'm just a light drinker, not an alcoholic.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Apparently I was so drunk last night I got stuck in the revolving door at the hotel. They have suveliance vidoes of it.
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
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