kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
HE LITERALLY JUST PEED IN MY ROOM IDK WHAT TO DO HELP
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
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