hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
He passes out, I smoke his kush. All's fair in love and a disappointing lack of sex.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
Well that's another check off the sexual bucketlist of things I never wanted to experience.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
He told her Jesus wouldnt yell curse or degrade her. He'd just simply shake his head and slap the shit out of her
It has gotten to a point where I just want to sit on his face. Less butterflies, more orgasms.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
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