If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
the girl sitting next to me in class is using her birth control box as a ruler
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
Cookies. Watch out fir falling satellites.
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
I put the child locks on after I put you in the car and you then screamed, "I am a Phoenix, you can't restrain me. I NEED TO FLY!"
Randomize
