I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
It was either a cute kinda butch tomgirl or a really fem guy. Either way, I made out with it. Bisexuality, my best friend.
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
Its alot like that time you got motorboated by the carni at the rodeo.
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
You said, "I'll have this whole island inside of you by 6 AM. Just point out who you want and I'll make it happen."
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
