brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
sometimes i shoot so far i amaze even myself.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
when i tried to put the condom on he started screaming about how he didn't want his groceries bagged
Oh wait looks like my cousin is getting deported THERE'S HOPE FOR THIS CHRISTMAS YET
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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