My cock was attacked by outdoor plants
wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
I can't even go pee because I'm making sure he doesn't run off somewhere naked.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
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