So I just almost came on my own face I had to dodge it as it was flying by...that was a first
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
I hooked up with a guy dressed as Justin Timberlake, while dressed as Britney Spears. Fuck Jessica Biel, all my 90's dreams are coming true.
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
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