It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Wouldn't be the first time..I think there's a subliminal message constantly playing in my mind that says 'blackout', 'throwing up is fun' 'too sober'
you fully convinced the taxi driver that we were in a race
i just had to hear from a third party that he came inside of me
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
I can't wait till we are old and wrinkly and I can turn to you and ask, "Remember when you Rick Jamesed the shit out of that couch??"
My roomate has me out looking for easter kegs hidden arround town
Wow. Last night.
I knew you were shit blasted when you called me your "sunflower queen"
I'm questioning my decision to swallow this morning while my stomach was in hangover mode
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
