So I got a little fucked up on the punch, and made out with the family friend. Which is apparently morally reprehensible. I don't get that.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
What happened last night and why am I partially covered in queso?
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
there's still a lot i don't remember, like why my iphone's nailed to your wall
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