At a sweet 16. cant remember what shirt im wearing byt dnt worry im not sleeping w/ the guy who serves the chicken nuggets again
Yeah, getting the HI-fiVe would really put a damper on my whoring around.
I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Like if a baby's bottom had nipples, that's how my boobs feel
To drink from my fkask next to a cop car or to not drink from my flask next to a cop car
I wish there was a morning after pill for dominoes.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I can’t shake the image of her gigantic black unibrow. It’s like I got a blowie from Eugene Levy
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