): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
you walked in on him eating me out and screamed SHE'LL BREAK YOUR HEART BRO before body slamming on the ground and passing out on the floor
I made a bong out of my deodorant today. Did you?
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
If I'm able to walk tomorrow morning, I'm gonna be really disappointed with myself...
Randomize