Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
How do i tell my boyfriend " I'm taking the two weeks im in Europe to fuck my way across 9 countries" in a way where we will still be together?
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Actually here it's more "lie around naked in a dark room" weather.
For a second I thought that you were becoming a decent person again. I am glad I was wrong.
Totally just got spotted hitting the bowl by someone else hitting a bowl. We gave each other a head nod
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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