So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
The good news is I managed to avoid the three cop car looking for me. The bad news is I no longer have shoes.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
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