I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
I had total buyers remorse when i finally got him naked. All that effort for a dude that hairy? Come on.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
I feel like a bad episode of csi trying to figure everyone's DNA that's in me
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
for a minute I thought I needed to put on pants to go get a burrito, but then I remembered I'm in college
What ever happened to the whole 'innocent until proven guilty' thing. Like 'not pregnant until proven pregnant'. That's how it should be...
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
the bastard is cheating on me with some sleazy barista from Starbucks
That’s his wife they’re back together
You say potato, I say sleazy barista
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