I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
Tried to put an eye patch on while hooking up with a girl. She was not amused.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
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