Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
I dinstinctly remember making out to "I believe I can fly" and waving my arms like a bird to the beat.
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Discovery: there is a folder in my pictures labeled "Your Name and cats"
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
