My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I need to buy a mesh tank top to fit in in Florida. Where do they even sell that shit?
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Nothing to be ashamed of. I bet Oprah has sharted.
Yeah come over whenever. Weed gets here at 8.
I'll be there at 7:59.
Randomize
