no you cant smoke seaweed
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
Randomize
