took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
if another girl says "im usually cleaner down there" I'm just going to shoot myself
I'm not upset with you; I'm upset with Fox News.
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
Its raining shots and i keep catching them in my mouth like you with dicks shits crazy
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
So the doorbell rang while we were banging, and I'm pretty sure the pizza man saw my dick. But hey, we got pizza.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
Randomize
