I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
I wish there were birth control emojis
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
I'm glad we can *facepalm* it together over the married couple we fucked separately.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
I just got offered free tattoos if I smuggle some guns from OKC to Dallas for a guy in the hells angels
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
its Niagara falls. its like international waters. You can get away with anything there
He’s like Batman if Batman went down on me and gave me multiple toe curling orgasms. He left without saying a word before I pulled the pillow off my face
Find out if he’s shared his techniques with a friend and set me up with him. You know I’ve always had a thing for Robin!!!!
I was trying to be good but he showed up with dinner and wine and I exploded. Like a bomb. A dirty, sexy bomb
Randomize
