so i know my style isnt the best ever but u should have told me i was wearing two different shoes
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I think thats the most anyones ever pregamed for rollerskating
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
You just made it sound like a children's toy! It's a functioning body organ, my vagina is not a gameboy!!!
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
He said I act like a cross between a kindergartener and a high 70 year old man. Which is inacurate because it fails to account for the disco obsession.
My card got declined when I tried to buy dippin dots at 2 am, the lady gave them to me for free because "I looked like I needed them."
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
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