Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Aside from the fact that im drinking wine straight from the bottle to save doing dishes, im also standing in front of the oven to save turning on the heater. its gonna be a rough winter.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Two chicks walked outta his room and all he did was beat his chest like LeBron and yell, "And 1!"
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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