i need gas-x and some way to take back every single thing i did last night.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
I'm gonna write a book one day about how to be the less attractive person girls settle for after getting dumped. I will send you a copy
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Randomize