he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
The slot machines are wishing me happy birthday. Mission success.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I definitely think you should enjoy one last spring break being a sorostitute before you get serious and settle down with price charming. I mean hes not going to be there any way. he can wait a week.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
She's gonna be mad if she finds out you put weed in her house warming cookies
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