I just used my 2 drink stirrers as chopsticks to get a lime out of my drink. I really am Asian.
he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
he obviously didn't care that i was sleeping and dreaming about ellen degeneres knitting me a christmas sweater.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Finally hooked up with her. She bought me tacos after because "she can do better in a bed". You're gonna be my best man.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Randomize
