Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
So can you tell me who's underwear is on the cat?
Was last night real? Did I lick your forehead while you laid in between my legs while we laid next to your boyfriend?
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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