Think I'm gonna go cougar hunting tonight... Any advice?
condoms and good judgment
Can I buy both of those at the same store?
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
You remember the guy that busted in waving a tazer at everyone yelling "get the fuck outta my crib"?
yeah you don't forget that shit easily
We ended up crawling out from our hiding spot and playing pool with him once he calmed down. His name is Marcus. I got his email.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
Maybe just the first 2 wks of Nov can be dick detox.
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
You had me at "let me see your balls"
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
Randomize
