Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
Just spent the last three hours in the library successfully refreshing facebook
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I tried to suck your dick underwater and almost drowned
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
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