this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
about to get into a hot tub with three cops. this cant go well
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
You crowd surfed from beer pong into the bathroom where you spent the rest of the night, also I have your wallet
Why can't you just come over, fuck me, then leave so i can get stoned and watch law and order?
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
tell me about the eggs
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
