Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
he also bled all over my floor. unrelated to cats but true nonetheless.
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Yeah I know my dick is weird, but I've surprisingly had a lot of fun with it.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
Randomize
